|Posted by Brian on January 11, 2014 at 4:25 AM|
Posting the Necropsy photo's of Val was harder than I thought. I have been procrastinating in posting them for a very long time. I have scanned in the actual "report" that the Doctor's prepared, and I will get that on this site as soon as I can. (to be found on the Necropsy page).
The final conclusion of Valerie's death was Salmonella I believe. I will re-read the report. I find it hard to swallow, being that all tests on the fluid that was apirated from her gullet over the past 11 months came back negative for any bacterium. However, I realize that bacteria in the "fluid" vs. bacteria in the "blood" are two totally different things.
I noticed that in t hose photo's of Val, I see "black" inside of her. Seeing the black color is of course a "red" flag to me. The location of the "black" coloring was a surprise to me, as it was up and down the sides of her body, and not near her gullet where the outter physical problems were.
I kept Val on paper towels, and changed them often. I was especially careful NOT to allow bacteria in her hom, or food/water dishes. I took special care, and prided myself as such. So this, was a huge kick in my face, and an embarrassment of sorts as well.
Someone said, "she could have gotten a bad cricket" or a "bad worm". Perhaps her immune system wasn't the same as your other dragons, therefore, she succummed where the others didn't have a problem at all.
Whenever I think back on Valerie Rose, I smile. I remember what a character she was, and how close we became in her time of illness. I think of our trips to the park. I think of all of the trouble only she would get into!
I think of handing her off to the Vet tech in Cornell saying "Go on Bal....Be a good girl, now you go"....and never seeing her again.
I think why the hell didn't I do something else sooner? 11 months of aspirating the fluid from her gullet? REALLY? 11 months?? Why didn't I go somewhere else and try something different?
Why did I ever let her out of my arms that night?
I "should have" just let her pass away in my arms, close to my chest, warm, and loved with her Daddy.
I should have.
Why didn't I ?
Well, I can't go back in time. So I have had to let that go. I have come to accept that Valerie is with me ALWAYS in spirit, and I wear her ashes around my neck whenever I go anywhere.
I only "hope" now, that her story can help somehow.
I can only "hope" that I WILL see her again someday.